The weekend before I left Zim mid-2021 we visited my sister, brother-IL & their kiddos up in Victoria Falls.
On our last day, my mum, step-dad & I went to the actual Falls.
It was high season so roughly 625 million litres of water were cascading over the 108m-high basalt cliff PER MINUTE.
I’ve been to Vic Falls numerous times over the years but I’ve personally never seen it so full.
A continuous cloud of spray shot up high into the sky, creating a thick wall of mist preventing us from seeing the other side and sometimes the sun; when she did peak through though, gentle, golden rays danced across my already sun-kissed, freckly face.
Given all that tourism currently is around the world, we had the entire place to ourselves. (And thankfully Paris Hilton only vacayed there a few weeks later.)
We each went off in different directions – I found myself watching a rainbow attempt to make an appearance at the Devil’s Cataract lookout point.
Despite having stood in that spot many a-time, I was still in complete awe.
And this pretty much happens whenever I visit the Almighty Mosi-oa-Tunya or “The Smoke That Thunders”.
There’s a deep sense of connection, of life flowing in and through, of being fully present to the gift of all that that moment is.
This experience isn’t just limited to when I’m standing in front of one of the seven natural wonders of the world though.
It also happens each and every time I get my period.
(Correct – I did just compare the experience of having my period to that of visiting Victoria Falls. This isn’t my thinly veiled cry for help – stay with me!)
Yes there’s the big joy from the health side of all that having a regular, healthy cycle indicates (especially when I didn’t have a proper period for more than a decade).
But for me, there’s also more to it than that.
Anne Frank described her period as having “the feeling that in spite of all the pain, discomfort and mess, [she was] carrying around a sweet secret.”
And that’s it for me – a “sweet secret” that brings with it a fuller presence, a heightened aliveness & a deeper sense of surrender.
This doesn’t last long though – maybe the first day or so of my period – but heck, for me, it’s enough to make every single decision that allows for the reality of my regular periods, completely worth it.
It makes these choices expansive & embodied, not restrictive.
It keeps me anchored.
It’s my current why that means something to me.
And that’s the important part.
Because you might be reading this convinced that I’m completely nuts but that’s chill – my why, my anchor, doesn’t have to make sense to you, just as yours doesn’t have to make sense to me.
The point is that you have something – something that resonates for you and isn’t rooted in fear or societal expectations. Something to come back to so you can keep on keeping on.
You might be thinking how easy it is for me now that I have a regular period & all – that I’ve got ‘evidence’ to anchor into, to find a ‘why’ for.
But remember it wasn’t like this when I first set out (less than a handful of real periods over an entire ten plus years, yo!).
My anchors, my ‘whys’, were clunky AF to begin with (I discovered that was largely because I didn’t believe I was worthy of them, but more on that another time).
But still, I found them, and they were enough to keep me going to get to where I am today – living out and into my embodied why that continues to be ever-evolving because life, because layers.
So this is nothing more than a loving invitation, for wherever you’re at on your PCOS journey, to give space to explore & get curious about your whys.
They’re not just a nice-to-have but what will ultimately guide your path in making your desires for your body (and life!) your lived reality.
And if you feel called to do so, get in touch to share what those are for you – I’m all ears for your experience and I see you.
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